The Unknown

I've always found it a challenge to face the unknowns of a situation.
I suppose it's my curiosity that's gotten the better of me, over the fear, that is. But I've also noticed that I've only been willing when I was mature enough to grasp the concepts and consequences of the situation I'm about to face. When I have been forced to approach the obstacle at a time when I was not ready, I found that I would retreat and withdraw from my normal outgoing self.
Fear can be a powerful thing. It can change a person, instantaneously! It can make the weak strong or the powerful whimper; it can make the brave cower or the meek charge. Fear is a threat to a person's well-being, their status, rights, or to what is important to them. Just like the fear an animal experiences and reacts to with natural instincts; we humans have the same threats and surges-just on different levels.
True character emerges in these times of adversity. What is your true character? Have you had times that have challenged who you truly are? It's easy to revert back into habits of familiarity, our blankets of comfort-what we know because we know how to handle them-but beyond that? Do you dare?
A flower thrusts through the shield of its seed to grow, blossom and flourish beauty and share their lovely fragrance with all-a chick breaks free from the shell of which it developed to fight against the odds of all its predators to succeed in survival-where are you hiding? Are you ready to leave the comforts of your confine?
Free yourself from your Fears. Have Faith. Believe in yourself and your capabilities. Reach out, expand your wings and fly!

Making Headway...

Having a blog is an upkeep that I haven't done well with so far...I always have so much to say, but seem to turn more to the verbal expression of myself these days than the written. I have written about 20 journals/diaries in my life, among the countless poems, stories, letters, notes, inspirational messages, emails, texts, and social media messages! I have never had a problem expressing myself.
I write this at midnight on no particular occasion to touch base (after another 2 years) and update my status, with high hopes at continuing this pursuit of expression. 

I am ending a wonderful school year as a guidance counselor-a career I thought I had hung my hat up on due to the political drama I had faced in my last position. I have ventured into and out of the pursuit of my doctorate degree, the private adoption field, the mental health counselor for a private agency and a small dabble in dry cleaning. An odd combination, I know, but my path nevertheless. I am back into the schools as a guidance counselor and continuing this venue for another year. I also have stepped back into non-profit to continue acquiring my Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC) internship hours-only 1100 left of the 1500 I need :)

I begin this Summer 2015 with many goals: learning to write children's books, take various online classes for animal psychology certification, veterinarian support assistant certification, Vizual coaching academy courses and continuing religious education seminars for the Diocese of Orlando. I would also like to learn to play the keyboard and the guitar, finish my painting and continue painting, increase my physical fitness, travel to Ohio & possibly Niagara Falls with my mom & son, and do some household organizing. Sound pretty ambitious? I think so too. I set my goals high so I know how hard of an incline I have to climb and I can get started in the right mind frame for success!!

I have met a lot of different people over the past two years and have learned and grown a lot, both personally and professionally. My biggest lesson has been Boundaries! I am a giving person and willing to work hard for anyone, but that combination set me up for people using me, taking me for granted and bullying me into situations that I couldn't deny or even redeem myself. This pattern has set me up for losing respect from others, threatening my employment on several occasions and most importantly, hurting me from the betrayal and shame. It's a hard lesson and not one I would bestow on anyone. Ultimately, I persevered & came out on the other side, stronger and wiser! I am satisfied with where I am and know there was a purpose for those trials in order for the lesson to be achieved. I thank God everyday for being patient with me and helping guide me in the way that I need so I can continue to succeed, for me, for my family and for God!

Beautiful Cancun Sunset over the Gulf of Mexico, June 2013.

I have finally found it!!!

Making my way back to this site after 4 years was an eye opener to me...where have I been???
I'm glad to have begun this blog back then. It was a good outlet & an even better beginning to what I am working on & what I have awaiting me!

Since that profound time of my last visit, I have gone through a total transformation of physical, mental, emotional, spiritual & social identity.

On a personal note: I had moved to Florida in 2008 with my family due to a job transfer, had a difficult time finding employment and struggled to settle my family in their new schools, jobs, while balancing our financial struggles. The marriage of 13 years had been deteriorating for several years, leading to a separation in 2010. My boys faced a lot of major transition & emotional struggles during these past few years & it was difficult for everyone. Finalization occurred in 2012 and with strained, emotional roller coaster relationships, my teenage boys & I have settled into a new phase. Transitions are hard for everyone, but the trials of these past few years have been especially hard on my boys & I am proud of their strength, endurance and stamina. They have overcome, and so have I. 
On a professional note: I gained employment as a school counselor in 2009, faced abrasion, 'let go', and unemployed for four months before fighting my way into an agency that I have strived to obtain & maintain employment successfully for the past two years. I decided to 'up the ante' in my life & began studies for my doctorate at NCU. I look forward to the online coursework consuming my life for the next 5 years until I achieve my Ph.D in Psychology. In the process, I will fulfill the internship hours and test requirements necessary to become a Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC) for the Department of Health in the state of Florida.
On a spiritual note: My family became members of Riverside Presbyterian Church in Cocoa Beach in 2009. We have been very involved & I have enjoyed & appreciated the spiritual recharge that I receive every Sunday. Since then, I have been assisting with the box office after the first service, became a deacon for the OMEC commission & joined in the new member/member improvement commission for community outreach.
On a physical note: I spent most of 2009 running 5Ks throughout Brevard County, completed my 1st triathlon in 2011, Life's a Beach, in Daytona Beach & enjoyed the challenge of a mud run in Sept 2012 with my family. My workouts are much to be desired due to time constraints, but always enjoy kayaking, swimming, running, lifting, the elliptical machine, tennis, climbing, hiking, ice skating & looking forward to trying paddle boarding with my family soon!
So there I was...and here I am. Four years is a lot of time, but flies by so fast.
My youngest son started at the Jr/Sr high school this year. A scary first few weeks since he didn't know anyone or the campus. He's adjusted well & is doing great!
My eldest son will graduate this year. He asked for his baby picture for the yearbook...reflective pause...He's grown so much! He's taking the working path for his initial plan...back to Ohio to see what he can learn from family trades...from there- the world is his option!

The trials of our lives gives us every opportunity to fully live or run & hide, to learn & grow or break &cry.  My web address: laugh, cry, live - that is what it is. Four years have given me lots of laughs and lots of tears...but no regrets.
My definition of Regret: I can only regret mistakes. Mistakes are something that shouldn't have happened, but if I learned something from it, then it was an important part of my life, of who I am today & I'm glad it happened. I can't regret something I learned from & helped me to become a better person.
Every day is a new day...take from it what you want and leave the rest behind!

What Tomorrow Beholds

How many of you had a day today that you just wanted to scream at? How many of you could have a slugged a select few without looking back? How many of you behaved "appropriately" to the situation because you knew that anything other than would have left you worse off?
It seems that there are always logical ways to process the "proper" actions and reactions to choose for any given situation. The reality is that in the heat of the moment, there is very little thinking going on. A confrontation by a colleague or employer, the traffic jerk that cut you off, your child/dog that demands one more thing as you're walking out the door, the assignment that the computer ate...the list can go on, as I'm sure you know.
Each situation we face accumulates to complete our day. So as we reflect upon whether our day was good or bad, where does your focus lie? If you're like most folks, it's probably on the negative. It's what is natural for our society to focus on, unfortunately. But was it really all that bad, and what good does it to focus on all the wrongs that occurred?
As I sit reflecting on my day, week, past month, I have to truly challenge myself to weigh the positives of my life against the negatives, in order to find a good reason to get out of bed tomorrow and begin again.
The bottom line for me is simply this: Why not?
What do I have to lose? Is there something that is waiting for me that I truly cannot handle? Do I have such little faith in myself? Or maybe what's lacking is my faith in others to be caring or helpful as I search through my day?
What is your motivation every day? Family responsibilities? Work obligations? Personal goals?
I guess a better question would be: What do you want your Motivation to be?

Why LaughCryLive

What is Real to you? What has made your days, hours, moments memorable & meaningful?
Is it the ones that made you laugh, or made you cry, or even the ones that you laughed until you cried?

The good, bad or indifferent of our lives typically stimulate an array of emotions that usually help us to cope with the various situations we face everyday. I have found that the most important, life-altering events of my life have involved a shedding of tears of sadness or joy.

There have been other times when I have been so overwhelmed that something simple will trigger a burst of laughter. It is very typical for me to find myself laughing uncontrollably, sometimes into tears. I don't know whether other people have experienced the same reactions to the stressors or events of their own lives, but I find it very refreshing :)

When I was faced with the decision to name my blog, I wasn't sure where to start. For those that know me well, I am a person of substance & like to reflect that upon any given moment. I want a meaning & purpose for who I am, what I say & how I do things. I think we get wrapped up in all the busy-ness of our day that we forget the meaning of the purpose.

Well, the bottom line for me is the Living! Living life to the fullest! Laughing & Crying is an important part of Living. An important part that I would like to share with you!

My Tomorrow Today

Our eyes are opened to all the realities around us. Sometimes we don' t even know what we're looking at until it's right on top of us...yet here we are.
I'm interested in all the fuss that blogging has created in our virtual world. I'm interested in all the things that people have to say about their own worlds; the changes they've encountered & the ones they are eager to discover.
I'm interested in how your life has been altered by one significant aspect that brought you to where you are today. In the process, I plan on taking you through my own path of discoveries; my own adventures, perspectives, ideas & interests.
I don't know what I'm doing here, any more than you. Even though, I have curiousities & hopes that this becomes more than what I can ever expect it to be.
More importantly, that you will join me to share the moments that we had Yesterday, the ones we embrace Today, & all the ones we cherish throughout our Tomorrows.