Fear

I'm not afraid. I face it and rise above it. I wear the scars of my fight with pride. I know my strength and trust my spirit to lead me. I will not sacrifice my dignity for my destiny. I will not let the trivial pursuits of others to have power over me or hurt me. No one can dictate or define me without my permission. I will stand with integrity and honor in the face of fear. I have nothing to lose. I am a simple, humble woman that has learned to love my faults and flaws; that doesn't give up on what/who I believe in, yet accepts defeat once I know I've given my all; who trusts and loves with all my heart and isn't afraid to feel the struggle or hurt of my passion!!

Just breathe...

Fire is a beautiful thing. I've always loved a good camp fire. Just to sit and watch the flames dance, the colors blend and bend to the timber, the wind, the night air. But have you ever watched fire burn in an enclosed container? It dies. There is no oxygen for it to breathe. It's a slow painful death, but an abrupt ending to a beautiful creature. It's interesting because I don't think a lot of people think about how oxygen is such a key component for fire's existence. Mostly it is considered that flammable items is what fuels the fire, but it's the air that allows the fire to flourish. It takes nurturing of a fire for it to burn to its full potential - strategic laying of the wood so air can flow under and around it, paper or leaves for it to catch and begin burning the tinder until it gets hot enough to ignite the wood. There's a lot more planning and strategizing than some think.
Fire is such an amazing natural element. It provides us with so much - warmth, means to cook food, light, security, protection, energy; but if you get too close it can burn. It can burn pretty bad. It can even kill.
You may be able to manipulate the environmental factors of fire to manage it, but it can't be controlled. All it takes is for fire to be in a barren or an unmonitored flammable area for a fire to take off and destroy everything in it's path. Fire may be extinguished by various means, but then its dead. More fire may always be recreated, but the fire that has been extinguished will never revive again.
Sometimes I think of relationships being the same. We need to just breathe...
It's very common to think that when in a relationship that constant togetherness is a mandatory factor to the relationship's success. On the contrary, not everyone is designed to be domesticated and caged. A person that is a free spirit needs room to breathe. They need space to flourish. They require nurturing and support from various means of fuel for them to ignite and exist in their full potential. It takes work and respect. You can't suffocate them with questions, demands, confinement - they'll become resentful or even worse, broken, and their spirit will die. You can't criticize who they are, by comparing them to who they're not. They will blaze out of control and burn you in the process. A free spirit can bring light, love, energy, security, protection & always leave you wanting more. But just as you must be patient when starting a fire and maintaining it with the same space and respect, you must do the same with a free spirit.
It's hard to not want to conform them, contain them; but without oxygen to breathe and move, their passion for you will die too. It's important to enjoy them, respect them, encourage them, but don't smother them. The embers don't last long once the fire is extinguished.

 So much relies on the oxygen we breathe. Don't deprive those you care about because of your own desires. Carefully nurture their needs and you will lavish in the joys that their fire will bring.

Journey through

In what direction do we travel? Do you have a compass? A map? A guide? Wouldn't it be great to have a GPS to direct us in time or distance through life? It would indicate the next challenge, time the next accomplishment, determine our destination. It would be nice to know the next employment opportunity, the upcoming encounter or relationship, if there are any detours to avoid the pitfalls of personal or professional dramas. Wouldn't it be great to be advised on which route is the best within our time constraints and when it is time to rest or refuel? Wow! A GPS for all our doubts, insecurities, worries and concerns; something truly reliable for every situation! But is that true?

How many times has your vehicle GPS failed you?? Even a satellite driven GPS will still not be able to anticipate everything!!! Calculating things to the minuet detail sometimes sets us up for disappointment or failure. It's not realistic to expect perfection from such an imperfect race. We always seem to mess things up somehow. But it's not what you do, but how you handle it, that shows your true character.

I love the phrase, 'Follow the road less traveled.' It never made sense to me growing up. I was raised in the country and would go wandering through the woods for hours upon hours. The first thing you learn, even as a child, is stick with what you know or you're going to get lost. I always wanted to return home, so I had no plans on getting lost-I stuck to the paths. But being a bold-headed child, I grew into that phrase more than I knew. It isn't until you become a pre-teen/teenager with direct intention of making a statement and a stand, even on things irrelevant, that you seem to distinctly recognize the things you are stirring up and the new paths you are creating. You take pride in the fact that others notice you and that they may be interested in following you somehow and so, your path is recognized as valuable and important. You did that, you made that happen, you made a statement that became worthwhile! You're not a kid anymore. Worlds have broadened, perspectives enlightened. Our journey has begun...

Now as adults, what philosophy do we follow: 'Do what you're supposed to' or 'Follow the road less traveled.' What's easier? What will be more acceptable? What are the consequences we face? What are the risks involved? What's plan B? Is the gain worth the loss? How can it be measured? How will I be judged? Is it aligned with my goal? How will it help or hurt me or the people around me? What if I fail? What if I succeed? What will I do next? Can I really handle the end result either way?

Ultimately, regardless of the questions asked, the answer given or the decision made,

Will you choose to be Happy?

Formation and Transformation

Formation and transformation of self is the biggest challenge of life. As we grow through the different stages of life, we face the obstacles of developing naturally and normally. Naturally, by human standards, more by God’s standards and the need to fulfill the evolutionary pattern of a human life. Normally, also by human standards, but more by society’s standards and of which cultural influence of ethics, values and morals determine the dictation and definition of normal. Where do we even have a chance??

Each realization of self throughout these stages is scary; scary because of change-change that is not predictable, reliable or guaranteed. How are we supposed to identify with ourselves if we don’t even understand what is going on around us or with us?

When I hear formation, I think of play-do or legos or building blocks. Transformation reminds me of the Transformers cartoon/movie/toys. I remember playing with all these things as a child. I would love to build, create, manipulate the toys and of course, destroy my creations. Is that relative to what we do to ourselves as we grow throughout our lives? 

We work, create, manipulate our way through, have pride in our development and accomplishments and then destroy them? This can be taken in so many contexts…family, friends, work, school, travel, and relationships, essentially both personal and professional developments. Do we self-sabotage through our expectations and impressions of ourselves and those around us? What do our accomplishments actually consist of if we follow this pattern throughout our lives? Is it necessary so that we can continue to learn and grow? 

I think of the development of the butterfly. The various stages that a butterfly develops is a continuous monumental example of how each stage of our lives is a definition of who we have become up to that point, but not the final product of who we truly are. That is up to each of us individually. What we decide to take from each stage, each experience, each encounter, and how we relate to it. So many people limit who they are by labeling themselves as being a certain way, ‘That’s just how I am’, ‘That’s just how I’m built’ or 'That's the way I've always been' -but is that all you have to offer? Is that all that will become of you? Or is there more to you than what you ever imagined?...Are you up for the challenge?
We are the only ones that can decide who we are and what in our life defines us. 

Choose wisely. 

The Unknown

I've always found it a challenge to face the unknowns of a situation.
I suppose it's my curiosity that's gotten the better of me, over the fear, that is. But I've also noticed that I've only been willing when I was mature enough to grasp the concepts and consequences of the situation I'm about to face. When I have been forced to approach the obstacle at a time when I was not ready, I found that I would retreat and withdraw from my normal outgoing self.
Fear can be a powerful thing. It can change a person, instantaneously! It can make the weak strong or the powerful whimper; it can make the brave cower or the meek charge. Fear is a threat to a person's well-being, their status, rights, or to what is important to them. Just like the fear an animal experiences and reacts to with natural instincts; we humans have the same threats and surges-just on different levels.
True character emerges in these times of adversity. What is your true character? Have you had times that have challenged who you truly are? It's easy to revert back into habits of familiarity, our blankets of comfort-what we know because we know how to handle them-but beyond that? Do you dare?
A flower thrusts through the shield of its seed to grow, blossom and flourish beauty and share their lovely fragrance with all-a chick breaks free from the shell of which it developed to fight against the odds of all its predators to succeed in survival-where are you hiding? Are you ready to leave the comforts of your confine?
Free yourself from your Fears. Have Faith. Believe in yourself and your capabilities. Reach out, expand your wings and fly!